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NYC: Surviving the Heat is Like Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse


surviving the heat

Surviving the heat in NYC: 5 ways you’re doing it wrong.

When NYC’s temperatures flirt with triple digits, it can feel like there’s no way surviving the heat in your sweltering office or apartment is even possible. Surviving a zombie apocalypse seems a whole lot easier. Well, as it turns out, we can learn a lot about surviving the heat from the best scientific tips about what to do (and what not to do) when facing a legion of reanimated corpses.

Surviving the heat in NYC, like surviving a zombie apocalypse, requires that you know what you’re doing and have the proper plan in place. Here’s what you are almost certainly doing wrong, and how to change your ways so you don’t get eaten alive by the summer heat and humidity.

1. Trying to hide only works for so long.

When the temperatures get steamy and surviving the heat gets tough in NYC, you may be tempted to head for the latest air conditioned Starbucks or movie theater and hang out there until the heat breaks. Bad strategy! First of all, everyone and his brother will be there wreaking havoc on the place and driving up the heat in there as well.

Second of all, hiding is only a temporary solution. What will you do when the heat wave/zombie apocalypse drags on for days or weeks? You can’t stay in that movie theater forever. The popcorn will eventually run out. The zombies, and the heat, will eventually catch up with you.

2. Giving in to the hysteria only makes things worse.

Heat waves and zombie attacks inevitably bring about the decline of civilized society. Simply surviving the heat can stretch every last nerve, and turn the most gracious and kind human being on the planet into a snarling villain. If you want to stay cool (and stay alive), you must fight this urge with every fiber of your being! Be forgiving of others who have fallen victim, and just be grateful you haven’t (yet) been eaten alive.

3. Behaving like an ostrich will land you in big trouble.

When you’re faced with a triple-digit heat forecast or a looming band of zombies, pretending it’s not coming will not help. Instead, face the facts and plan for the inevitable.

Surviving the heat means taking the following essential proactive steps so you’re ready for the worst:

  • Invest in cool, lightweight clothing for all occasions, just like you would be prepared for a zombie attack with a protective Ebola-style suit.
  • Stock up on cold consumables (ice cream and frozen margaritas are highly recommended) to get you through the days when you just can’t go outside for fear of mortal injury.
  • If you haven’t already done so this season, have your air conditioner serviced. The last thing you need is an unexpected breakdown at the most inopportune time! Neglecting your air conditioner is a mistake that can cost you dearly during a heat wave. Not only might you be forced to empty your wallet to get it fixed, you could be surviving the heat for days waiting for someone to come to your rescue.

Related article: Air Conditioning Maintenance Doesn’t Cost. It Pays.

4. Choosing the wrong weapons will cost you.

Ineffective weapons are dangerous, both in a zombie apocalypse and in a heat wave. Everyone knows to kill a zombie you need to destroy its brain, and kitchen knives are not going to be much help. When you’re surviving the heat, you can only do so much cooling with ice and fans, or with an AC unit that’s the wrong size or poorly maintained.

Surviving the heat requires air conditioning that works reliably. Getting that means taking care of it with regular service.

5. Going it alone is the biggest mistake.

Ok, how much do you really know about zombies? Probably not enough to fend off an attack on your own. Zombie experts recommend assembling a team with the right skills and qualities to help you survive.

The same is true of surviving the heat in NYC. Don’t let your handyman or your building’s maintenance crew attempt to service your air conditioner. Plan ahead (before the heat wave/apocalypse hits) and find a team of expert HVAC professionals with the right skills to make surviving the heat easy (for you at least):

  • The ability to stay cool (pun intended) under fire.
  • The training and experience to correctly deal with the problem at hand.
  • Willingness to take one for the team and do what it takes to get the job done (like climbing in 120 degree crawl spaces and braving rooftops to fix your ailing AC unit).

If you don’t find help before the crisis hits, you’ll be stuck with whomever is available, and that’s not likely to be the talented and reliable people you can count on.

Related article: 9 Skills Sherlock Holmes & A Great New York HVAC Service Tech Share.

The secret to surviving the heat in NYC this summer

Whether you’re faced with surviving the heat or a zombie apocalypse, the key is preparation. Doing this right will dramatically increase your chances of not only surviving, but coming through it with your dignity, and your wallet, intact.

The fact is, neglecting your air conditioner leads to increased breakdowns, inefficient operation, and comfort problems like high humidity and temperature variance. And the longer you neglect it, the more it’s going to cost you when Mother Nature turns up the heat. On the other hand, when you take care of your air conditioning equipment with regular maintenance, it will take care of you when you need it most for surviving the heat.

Remember, in a zombie apocalypse, the good guys always win. So make sure you call the good guys.

If you’re in NYC, get a quote for maintenance from Arista (the good guys).